1. I ignore important tasks when I drink, then in the morning I feel terrible that I didn’t get things done.
2. I sleep like crap. I wake up at 2-3 am – then it takes me ages to fall back asleep. I end up tired in the morning and not able to give my best at all.
3. Besides being tired I generally feel like crap. Not really hung over, but not good.
4. It’s just throwing money down the drain- or my throat.
5. I end up angry at myself when I drink for choosing to drink when I know it’s an awful decision. Waking up berating yourself is a horrible way to start your day. I end up starting my day feeling defeated and guilty. It rarely improves from there.
6. When I don’t drink, I feel better physically in the morning. I rarely had awful hangovers, but just felt blah.
7. When I don’t drink, I wake up in a better space mentally, which starts my day so much better.
8. When I don’t drink, I think more clearly throughout the day. I feel more in control.
9. When I don’t drink I feel proud of myself and more like a functioning,responsible adult.
10. I sleep better and wake up feeling refreshed instead of ick.
It’s late. Well late for me at least. 10:00pm. Today I have been plagued by a hideous headache. Not sure if it is related to the not drinking, the lack of sleep last night, or if I am coming down with one of the awful viruses that have been going around.
I was disappointed in the sleep situation last night! I was hoping that without drinking I would not be waking up at 2:30, unable to get back to sleep until just before my alarm goes off , but it was a night like all the others with tossing and turning for hours. Maybe tonight will be different.
Then, of course, the first news story today was about the bumper crop of California grapes which is resulting in wine prices going down! Of course it is. I stop drinking, motivated in part by the expense, and the price goes down! HA! The universe has even decided to tempt me!
I ordered some books from Amazon that arrived today.
The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober by Catherine Gray
This Naked Mind Control Alcohol by Annie Grace
Drink by Ann Dowsett Johnston
So now I have some real life reading to try to squeeze into my schedule.
I did help my daughter with her accessories for “Meme Day” at her school tomorrow. Baby Yoda and Welch’s fruit gummies (It’s a meme I am told). Even though she remembered late, the time didn’t matter since I wasn’t drinking so I could take her myself instead of having my husband do it. Then I was able to help her get her things together while we both had decaf tea. A nice evening.